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 Just.. (lindsay)

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PostSubject: Just.. (lindsay)   Sun Sep 05, 2010 9:39 pm

I was writing on a files, for complete it. And I was boring too. I started to count how many hours Then the idea to leave Lindsay cross my mind. She says to me that she has to go somewhere for doing something, but she don't want to tell me.
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PostSubject: Re: Just.. (lindsay)   Sun Sep 05, 2010 9:46 pm

I saw Danny sitting in our shared office, working on his paper work. I didn't feel like talking to him.. I was going back to Montana in like 2 days.. I sighed, how the hell was i gonna explain that? I was actually forced to go back, because of Eric. If that son of a bitch just didn't found me and stalked be I didn't have to do this... I told Mac that there were family problems back in Montana.. and that i just had to get there, so he gave me a week. Actually it was my ex boyfriend who told me he wouldnt stop stalking me and pay me a visit himself if i didn't come to Montana to talk to him... I dunno what has gotten into him, the rage in his voice... It felt like he was gonna kill me over the phone. So i think its the best to just go there and talk to him, tell him i don't love him anymore and that he has to forget me.. I sighed again and then walked into the office where paperwork was waiting on me too.

"Hey" I said without looking at him and dropping myself in my chair.
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PostSubject: Re: Just.. (lindsay)   Sun Sep 05, 2010 10:01 pm

My eyes fall on what I was doing. When I heard the sound of the voice of Lindsay. I lift my head and look. There was talk of his departure quickly enough. She did not tell me where she went or why. It had ended the discussion by a small argument, not too big, but it had ended like this. She enters the office still waiting for my answer. I know I'm not saying my word to stop doing, because we go out together only for a few weeks. I say finally. Hi...
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PostSubject: Re: Just.. (lindsay)   Sun Sep 05, 2010 10:05 pm

I sighed when i saw the huge amount of files i still had to read and fill in.. And still waited on a reply from Danny, but i felt relieved when he finally said hi back.. it felt like it was taking minutes before he replied.. but at least he replied after our argument... I just.. I think this whole stalking idea was getting on my nerves.. it was making me loose my best friend, my boyfr-.. whoa Lindsay! Stop right there... he's not your boyfriend.. okay you're dating him, but that doesnt mean he's your boyfriend, how badly you want it.
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PostSubject: Re: Just.. (lindsay)   Sun Sep 05, 2010 10:09 pm

Sure I'm not his boyfriend for the moment. That it's just how people can call it, ... dating.. Yeah that's. Of course I'd like to be more for her, from her eyes. But for the moment, I'm just his bestfriend, I hope better. Not better for be directly his boyfriend but high for know what she don't want to say to me where she go and why. I dunno what she want from me right now.. I know I'm the one who started the argument last night. So I just look on her.
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PostSubject: Re: Just.. (lindsay)   Sun Sep 05, 2010 10:19 pm

I opened the first file and started to read it.. it was quiet.. too quiet.. I felt Danny's eyes on me, I just felt he was looking at me, and so i shifted my eyes from the file to his, looking him right into his eyes beautiful ocean blue eyes. I knew what he wanted to know.. i knew it. But i just couldn't tell him about Eric. I knew he would flip, he would go with me and tear Eric apart. And i don't think thats the best idea.. I gave him a little smile and then tried to pay my attention back to the file i was trying to read.
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PostSubject: Re: Just.. (lindsay)   Sun Sep 05, 2010 10:21 pm

Okay It's true I look on her.. Waiting for something. But she didn't do anything. So I try to say to myself that she don't want to talk about. I read my paper, started to write, but stop and say. You are on a case ? Yes I said something but not about what happened yesterday
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PostSubject: Re: Just.. (lindsay)   Sun Sep 05, 2010 10:25 pm

I was reading the file over and over again, i just couldn't focus myself on it.. on the job i should be doing right now.. this is crazy Lindsay go and do your..- my thought was interrupted by Danny's question.

"What? Uhh no, a case from earlier today I gotta fill in some stuff" I said with one quick glance at him. "You?" I asked then, pointing at his file he was working on.
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PostSubject: Re: Just.. (lindsay)   Sun Sep 05, 2010 10:31 pm

I stop reading my file and look on her really fast then put again my eyes on the paper. No just do some papers work.
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PostSubject: Re: Just.. (lindsay)   Sun Sep 05, 2010 10:43 pm

At his reaction i could clearly make out he was pissed. I was now wondering if i did good with not telling him the truth.. We told each other to tell everything, no secrets. What little kids used to do with their best friends..

"Danny, please" I tried.. I didn;t want to leave New York with a fight.
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PostSubject: Re: Just.. (lindsay)   Sun Sep 05, 2010 10:46 pm

Pissed.. Yes I was just a little. But I would like to know too. She started a sentence and look on me.. Of course we say no secrets and she don't want to reply to me. So I agree. I look on her and say. What?
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PostSubject: Re: Just.. (lindsay)   Sun Sep 05, 2010 10:55 pm

i knew this moment would come.. Cause he had nothing to loose, he just wanted to know what was really going on.. He didnt took enough with 'family problems'

"its just some family stuff.. I'll be back before you know it.. C'mon" i tried.
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PostSubject: Re: Just.. (lindsay)   Sun Sep 05, 2010 10:59 pm

Yes I didn't too enough with this "family problems". I knew that was something for cover others things. She don't want to say to me, okay. After all she has the right to do this, I'm not his father or something else, I'm nothing for her at the moment, just his friend. Okay.
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PostSubject: Re: Just.. (lindsay)   Sun Sep 05, 2010 11:07 pm

i knew how he thought about this and i could see how he harshly didnt respond and looked back at his file. But he knew as good as me that he couldnt concentrate either..

"okay fine" i said with a sigh, throwing the file that i had in my hands on my desk.. "but only if you promise me you wont tell Mac"
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PostSubject: Re: Just.. (lindsay)   Tue Sep 07, 2010 9:47 pm

She starts to try to explain to me why she has to go out of New York. And I stop her right now. I'm not pissed anymore, I mean I was yesterday a little, but after this conversation I said to myself that if she don't want to say to me it was right. So now I've this point of view about her leaving. So I just say. Look, you don't want to say to me, it's okay.
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PostSubject: Re: Just.. (lindsay)   Tue Sep 07, 2010 9:50 pm

"You promise?" i asked him with a chuckle. I just wanted to hear him say it.. i actually already knew he wasn't gonna tell Mac, but i just wanted to hear him promise it to me.
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PostSubject: Re: Just.. (lindsay)   Tue Sep 07, 2010 10:10 pm

She ask me to promise with a chuckle. I knew what she wanted to. So I say. I don't want a fight right now, and if she don't want to say to me, it's maybe because it's no important by the way.Yes. It's okay.
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PostSubject: Re: Just.. (lindsay)   Tue Sep 07, 2010 10:17 pm

It felt good to hear him promise. I just.. I dunno why i needed that at the moment, maybe it was just the whole situation.

"As you figured.. it's kinda different then just family problems... It's my ex boyfriend who's stalking me since.. i think the last month.." i didnt tell him more, i first wanted to hear his reaction.
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PostSubject: Re: Just.. (lindsay)   Tue Sep 14, 2010 5:49 am

Okay, I don't have to ask to her about her old boyfriends. Because we are just at the beginning of our relation, and also because that only if she wants to talk about, that we will talk about. But you know, like all others guys and people on the world, I would know who was the last, or just if she was with someone else while I was dating her. She told that there are an ex boyfriend, but for how many months before me. And what say me that she is not with him too even if she say that this is an ex boyfriend, she could have more feeling for him now too. She looks one me and I look on her. I dunno what to say, because I was surprised, and also because I told her that I didn't want to hear just some minutes before, because I figured out that she didn't want and also because I told to myself that this is not my business. I have now to say something, anything but something. What other people could say if he would like to be on my place on this same situation. I really don't know, but she insist by looking on me. And I just say. Yes I was surprised and a little angry against myself.

What I am suppose to say ?
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PostSubject: Re: Just.. (lindsay)   Wed Sep 15, 2010 12:17 am

It took him a while to reply.. I dunno there were so many things flying through my head when i waited on a reply.. I hesitated if i made the right choice to tell him the truth.. what should he think? When he replied he sounded surprised, but also angry.

"I don't know Danny.." I sighed. "I just.. I have to stop it and i cant do this here in New York.. I-" I sighed again and then took a deep breath. "I shouldnt have told you".
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PostSubject: Re: Just.. (lindsay)   Sat Sep 18, 2010 7:49 pm

You said it. That's your problem.

I just said this to her, angry, but not because she told me, but because she has to wait till I asked her for told me it. Then I direclty look again my papers, and go to work one more time. Why we have to talk about it right now, or any others days, she don't want to tell me, and I asked and now that more a battleway between us. So I don't want to talk to this anymore
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PostSubject: Re: Just.. (lindsay)   Sat Sep 18, 2010 7:53 pm

His reply hit me hard.. harder then i expected, and his angry tune wasn't helping either. Before i could even say something he looked back at his papers and started to pick up where he left of.. I tried to stay calm but i felt tears brimming in my eyes.. so i quickly got up and left the office again, i didn't want him to see me like this.. this already was hard enough.. so i hurried to the restroom.
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PostSubject: Re: Just.. (lindsay)   Sat Sep 18, 2010 8:01 pm

I never want to be on this kind of situation, and really not with her on this kind of situation. I like her, but yes I said something, that I couldn't except from me. I hoped, I wished I never said this to her. But now it's done. She leaves the room directly after what I said, without look me, or say to me something. She just gone.
I don't know where. I don't know for do what. I don't even know if she will want to talk to me later, and hear my apologize. Or if she will want to see me.
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PostSubject: Re: Just.. (lindsay)   Sat Sep 18, 2010 8:04 pm

I took a couple deep breaths and checked my make up in the large mirror in the girls restroom again. I was so lucky that no one was there at the moment. Of course there could come someone in any moment.. You still saw that i had cried so i decided to wait a bit before i headed out of there again..
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PostSubject: Re: Just.. (lindsay)   Sun Sep 19, 2010 8:35 pm

I just walked past the office Danny and Lindsay use to work in and actually I thought they would be working there together as I knew they worked on a case together.
But as I looked into the office, I only saw Danny sitting there, all alone, hovering over his paperwork.
He looked a bit sad and somehow lost in thoughts. I took a deep breath and carefully knocked on the glass door, waiting in the doorway, looking at him with a concerned expression.
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PostSubject: Re: Just.. (lindsay)   Today at 12:55 pm

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